I’ve always been an outsider; a displaced person. Trying to fit in that inner circle. I felt wanted, popular, protected and loved. But it was only false hopes, beliefs, values and morals. I was a chameleon fed drugs, alcohol and any other addictions that made me “happy”.
I’m an addict got a habitual habit and I don’t avoid voids. Good at substitution replacing shit. I’m just trying to find my place with shit. I don’t have patience with people that can’t speak they mind. What the fuck they got a mouth for? Me, I’m so full of rage so used to being caged. I probably shouldn’t be outdoors. Everybody so scared of the TRUTH. Look in my eyes you stare at the TRUTH.
You still have a lot of time to make yourself be what you want. There’s still lots of good in the world. Although I’m clean and sober, I’m still surrounded around all the negativity, the bullshit, the liars, the cheaters, the conniving, the judgementals, the gossipers and the chronic relapsers. I’m taught to live life on life’s terms and live Just For Today. To witness and hear all those types of people in a day is stressful in itself. But I don’t pick up a drink NO MATTER WHAT.